Knife Dance

Wow, rough day in the cake office. Many a confused old lady wandered across our threshold today, then wandered out again when we explained that the ravioli place is two doors down. Who are these little old ladies, and why are they all looking for raviolis? The world may never know.

When I'm not directing folks to Joey's Pasta or whatever, my job is to take phone orders and organize them in our janky* computers with a bakery program that I'm pretty sure was designed in the 80s. I was told by the managers that I'd get to spend some time in the bakery once I'm trained for the Cake Department with the computers, but they have yet to make good. I'm told by the counter-staff that the only way to squeeze myself in is to just show up in the morning and start hanging around. Too bad I'm sort of afraid of the baker. He's a big dude, New Yorker to the core, and while I was changing out of my bike clothes this morning in the upstairs employee bathroom I heard him vocally ripping his assistants a new orifice or two. The guy spends all day piping pretty little roses on fluffy, cream-filled confections, and yet he's got the build and demeanor of a Hell's Angel. He's totally awesome.

Also, weather? It was freezing today, and I had to ride my bike to and from work in a tank-top. That's the last time I leave the house without a sweater in mid-June... in New York City...

Anyways, here's some stop-motion candy from High School. Took me hours and I was late for my calculus class. I got a talking-to, but I din't care cuz I'm BAD TO THE BONE!!!




*Yeah son, "janky" is a word. Check it.

It's time to raise cain!

Come one, come all! Witness the unfolding of an abominable anthology of artful articles, a brand-new breed of the bizarre and bready, a curious collection of crafty cakes and confections, a dastardly, decadent den of desserts, an, um, eggy... effluvium of um... well, that sounds terrible. Thanks a lot, Microsoft Word thesaurus. Useless.

Aaaaaand now that I've properly introduced myself, let's get this started!

I'm going to begin by posting some older pictures of pieces I did in High School, and then I'll start mixing more recent stuff in.
These are the first three pieces I've got on Flickr and the first I'm stickin on my blog, so enjoy them!!!*

This skull cake was made for a Gothic Literature class... Nothing screams gothic lit like the juxtaposition of blossoming life and the decay of death.

A closeup of that tiny topper.

Made this for a metalhead friend of mine; while he was horror-struck by the wailing of those lost souls I imprisoned in my icing, he was also surprised by the smooth flavor of the hellfire that laced the ganache filling. Eternal torment! Yummy!

This is the Glutton. He is made of thirteen layers of cake sandwiching twelve layers of ganache and a vein or two of marzipan. The body is sculpted marzipan, hand-painted, and that little cake he's holding is a homemade, hand-dipped candied-citrus-peel fondant brushed with lustre dust. Unnecessarily complicated? You know it! Revolting and yet oddly endearing? Always, my friends.

That about wraps this post up. Stay tuned cuz I'll be updating often as I have only just entered the honeymoon phase of my blog-sperience. Don't worry; before you know it I'll be crusty and jaded and I'll only post to complain about how I don't have time to post anymore.

Welcome to my blog folks! It's gonna be... different.

*note: my exclamation points are menacing. Menacing!!! Please do not mistake them for the politely enthusiastic variety. Those guys are pansies.
Thx! >=I

~CC Management